These are the full notes of my exegesis of Philemon in preparation for the lesson I taught in the Philippines. In the lesson, I only mentioned the points of this that specifically relate to loving other believers. Here's the bonus material. :-)
1 Paul, a prisoner of Christ Jesus, and Timothy our brother,
This is a "prison epistle", and the only one of Paul's letters where he introduces himself as a "prisoner of Christ", in prison for preaching the gospel. I couldn't find anything that said conclusively whether Timothy was also in prison at this time. To Philemon our beloved brother and fellow worker, Philemon was a Christian ministering in the church at Colossae who was not in prison. He was wealthy enough to own at least one slave, Onesimus. Some commentators think Philemon was a pastor.
2 and to Apphia our sister,
This is the only place in the Bible where Apphia is mentioned. This may have been Philemon's wife.
and to Archippus our fellow soldier,
Archippus was also addressed briefly in the book of Colossians(4:17). In that context, Paul mentioned him right after he gave a greeting to the church at Laodicea; Archippus was the only person specifically addressed there and may have been a church leader. Some historical traditions say that he was one of the 72 disciples appointed by Christ in Luke 10. Some historical accounts also suggest that Philemon, Apphia, and Archippus were all martyred under the persecution of Nero.
and to the church in your house:
The church at Colosse was a house church that met in Philemon’s house. He opened his home to allow his church to meet there. Meeting in homes was common in the early church; church buildings did not come until much later.
3 Grace to you ... from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.
Grace envelopes the teaching of all of Paul's letters, due to its centrality in the Christian faith; Christians are all recipients of it. God has no problems in Himself that we can fix, and there is nothing that we can offer Him. His responses to us are gifts of His grace.
... and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.
We have peace with God through Jesus Christ, and by peace, the blessings that result from grace come to us. Both grace and peace are only from God the Father through Jesus Christ. (source: Matthew Henry)
4 I thank my God always, making mention of you in my prayers,
Elsewhere in this book, Paul gives congratulations and commendations regarding Philemon and the others that he mentions based on their faith. However, he still prays for them.
No Christian who is still alive is beyond the need for prayer.
5 because I hear of your love and of the faith which you have toward the Lord Jesus and toward all the saints;
"I hear of" means that Philemon himself may not have been the one telling Paul about this. The love Philemon showed for the saints and their faith toward Christ had a testimony that reached beyond their city. "Toward all the saints"
does not limit Philemon's (or our) love to only believers, but it shows a
deeper bond of love between believers that we have in Christ, regardless of whether these saints are Jew, Gentile, slave, free, rich, poor, or any other possible category.
6 and I pray that the fellowship of your faith may become effective through the knowledge of every good thing which is in you for Christ’s sake.
But wasn't it already becoming effective? "Fellowship" and “effective" mean that the faith was becoming manifested to men (source: John Calvin).
Faith communicates itself by good works. "Every good thing which is in you" does not refer to good things that Philemon inherently had in himself, but to things that are there because of his faith in Christ ("for Christ's sake"). This is not to give glory to Philemon, but to give glory to Christ.
7 For I have come to have much joy and comfort in your love, because the hearts of the saints have been refreshed through you, brother.
Whether he is the pastor of the church or not, Philemon is ministering to the saints in his local church. Nowhere in Scripture is it mentioned that Paul actually had ever gone to Colosse, although one of his messengers, Tychicus, carried this letter and the epistle to the Colossians to Colosse. Paul had been to Ephesus, 100 km away, and was imprisoned there. So Paul has joy that
someone he most likely has not seen, who lives in a place that he has most likely never visited, is
serving the believers in this local church in a Gentile region (Asia Minor), which is part of the early stages of Christianity spreading around the world and outside the Jewish people.
8 Therefore, though I have enough confidence in Christ to order you to do what is proper, 9 yet for love's sake I rather appeal to you - since I am such a person as Paul, the aged, and now also a prisoner of Christ Jesus -
In 1 Corinthians 8, Paul addresses whether Christians can eat meat sacrificed to idols. He says that we can, but not all Christians have this knowledge, and less spiritually mature Christians would be tripped up by that. He says that he will not exercise this liberty around them and gives us an instruction to not cause our brothers to stumble. So he lays down his liberty. In this passage, Paul has the authority and confidence to order Philemon what to do. He was an apostle and mentions that he is "aged", probably at least 50 years old when he wrote this. And he has lived his Christian life preaching the gospel and facing much opposition. But in the verses to follow, Paul is going to
lay down his authority to command his brother. He is
not going to give a command, but an appeal, to Philemon. He is also writing this letter from a distance and may not know all of the circumstances involved.
10 I appeal to you for my child Onesimus, whom I have begotten in my imprisonment,
"My child" does not mean that Onesimus was Paul’s biological son. "Child" here is a term of endearment. It is referring to Onesimus as a spiritual child. Onesimus and Paul may not have met until Paul was imprisoned in Rome and shared the gospel with Onesimus. You can't have faith in the gospel without first hearing it, so one who gives instruction in it is like a parent (source: John Calvin). "Begotten" means that it was a result of Paul's ministry, not by Paul’s power. God is the one who saves.
who formerly was useless to you, but now is useful both to you and to me.
He was useless (a pun on his name - "useful") because he stole from his master. He was also useless to Philemon in terms of Christian fellowship because he was not yet a Christian. He is useful now because he is now a Christian, has left that life of sin, and can now be an honest servant. He is also a brother in Christ now who shares a bond with Philemon that they did not have when he stole.
12 I have sent him back to you in person, that is, sending my very heart,
Onesimus is most likely going back with Tychicus because slave-catchers in their day would have intercepted him on the way if he had traveled alone (source: John MacArthur). "My very heart" is also an appeal because it implies that if Philemon rejected the appeal, he was rejecting Paul's heart (source: John Calvin).
13 whom I wished to keep with me, so that on your behalf he might minister to me in my imprisonment for the gospel;
Here, Paul was
looking out for the interests of others, not his own interests. He wanted Onesimus to stay near him in prison and minister to him, but he wanted more than that for Onesimus, an escaped slave rightfully owned by Philemon to go back to his master.
14 but without your consent I did not want to do anything, so that your goodness would not be, in effect, by compulsion but of your own free will.
He wanted Philemon to
obey him willingly, not begrudgingly. Paul is sending Onesimus back, with the hope that Philemon will take him back. Philemon may have been inclined to see this as Paul rejecting Onesimus, "return to sender; I'm not interested in keeping him around". Or Philemon may have seen Onesimus wrong as too significant to accept taking him back. However, Paul is appealing to Philemon, who he has already commended for his love.
15 For perhaps he for this reason separated from you for a while, that you might have him back forever,
Onesimus went to meet Paul in Rome. Here, Paul is suggesting that the ultimate reason why Onesimus separated from Philemon is so that Philemon might have him back forever. But "forever" means beyond this lifetime. Onesimus and Philemon were not always brothers in Christ, but now they are. The text doesn't seem to say (in English) whether Paul says "he for this reason separated from you", meaning that Onesimus was intentionally doing this, or whether "this reason" means that Onesimus wanted to just run away, but God had a different purpose behind all of it. Calvin thinks it was the latter, pointing to the example of the trials Joseph went through in the book of Genesis. (Thoughts?)
16 no longer as a slave, but more than a slave, a beloved brother, especially to me, but how much more to you, both in the flesh and in the Lord.
Philemon only knew Onesimus as someone who worked for him and was dishonest at that. There was
no spiritually-based relationship between the two of them.
Now that has changed. Paul knows firsthand, from Onesimus' being there for him while he was in prison, that Onesimus is a beloved brother to him now. Paul’s understanding in v. 15 is that Onesimus only left Philemon "for awhile", but if Philemon receives Onesimus back, Onesimus will stay and serve him with a heart that God has changed and a repentance over his sin. Also, Onesimus never worked for Paul as his slave. Paul does not know firsthand how Onesimus served Philemon before he was a Christian.
Philemon might be the one person who would see the big change in Onesimus' life ("how much more") more than anyone else. Paul claims both Onesimus and Philemon as brothers in Christ, linking the two. Onesimus was already a "brother... in the flesh" to Philemon (not sure: were they actually biological brothers or only living in the same house / of the same lineage?), but now, more importantly, he is a brother in Christ to him.
17 If then you regard me as a partner, accept him as you would me.
Paul urges Philemon to accept Onesimus back because of the evidence in v.16 that he is now a beloved brother. "partner" refers to partnership in the gospel. "Accept him" - a repentant sinner showing genuine evidence of salvation - "as you would me" - a former persecutor of the church who killed Christians but has repented of even that. Philemon has already accepted Paul over a sin that could have had Philemon killed if he ever fell back into it.
18 But if he has wronged you in any way or owes you anything, charge that to my account; 19 I, Paul, am writing this with my own hand, I will repay it
This is the only place in the letter where Paul refers directly or indirectly to Onesimus’ sin. Paul takes the consequences for Onesimus' sin. Onesimus is a runaway slave, and if he has already spent the money, he can't pay it back. Paul has agreed to repay it himself so that
the loss of money consequent from the sin would not be a problem for Philemon. "I... am writing this with my own hand" emphasizes that Paul is really the one writing this.
(not to mention to you that you owe to me even your own self as well).
The Bible does not say this directly, but Philemon may have been saved under Paul's ministry. This is a parenthetical statement in some translations, such as the NASB (this one).
20 Yes, brother, let me benefit from you in the Lord; refresh my heart in Christ.
The context here is Paul's appeal that Philemon accept Onesimus back. “Accept[ing] [Onesimus] as you would me" (v. 17) would be a benefit and refreshment to Paul. It would benefit Paul to see this relationship between Philemon and Onesimus restored more than it would for Onesimus to stay with Paul (vv. 13, 16). This is a different kind of benefit and refreshment "... in the Lord... in Christ". The gospel of Christ changed Paul's heart so that he would see Onesimus' being away from him (and possibly never coming back to him) as a "benefit” and "refreshment".
21 Having confidence in your obedience, I write to you, since I know that you will do even more than what I say.
Paul appealed to Philemon rather than commanding him (v.9), but still considered that if Philemon followed through on this appeal it would be "obedience" (v. 21). Paul had confidence that Philemon would obey him and accept Onesimus back. He knew that Philemon would do more than simply accept him back.
22 At the same time also prepare me a lodging, for I hope that through your prayers I will be given to you.
Although Paul was in prison, he had faith that he would not stay there for the rest of his life. He hoped to see Philemon in Colosse. If he had gone, he would have been able to see whether Philemon accepted Onesimus back and what kind of role he had given him.
23 Epaphras, my fellow prisoner in Christ Jesus, greets you,
Epaphras preached the gospel to his fellow Colossians (his own people) and came to Paul in Rome with a favorable account of the Colossian church while Paul was in prison there. In Colossians 4:12, Paul tells the church at Colosse that Epaphras is "always laboring earnestly for you in his prayers, that you may stand perfect and fully assured in all the will of God... he has a deep concern for you and for those who are in Laodicea and Hierapolis." In Colossians 1, Paul reminds the church there that they heard of the gospel (v. 5) and understood the “grace of God in truth" (v. 7), which they learned from Epaphras (v.8), who Paul calls "our beloved fellow-bond-servant, who is a faithful servant of Christ on our [Paul and Timothy's] behalf."
24 as do Mark, Aristarchus, Demas, Luke, my fellow workers.
Mark: Historical accounts are divided over whether this was the same Mark who wrote the book of Mark. This Mark was definitely with Paul on his missionary journeys and apparently with him during his imprisonment at Rome.
Aristarchus: A Macedonian from Thessalonica. In Acts 20, Aristarchus had accompanied Paul on a missionary journey from Greece through Macedonia to Syria. Aristarchus was also on board a ship with Paul in Acts 27 when they were shipwrecked. When Paul wrote to the Colossians, Aristarchus was in prison.
Demas: Demas was with Paul during his first imprisonment in Rome. He also sends his greetings in Colossians. But in 2 Timothy, Paul writes that Demas forsook him, "having loved this present world". John Calvin wrote of Demas, "And
if one of Paul’s assistants, having become weary and discouraged, was afterwards drawn aside by the vanity of the world,
let no man reckon too confidently on the zeal of a single year; but, considering
how large a portion of the journey still remains to be accomplished,
let him pray to God for steadfastness."
Luke: A physician who wrote the Gospel of Luke and the Acts of the Apostles, possibly one of the Seventy.
25 The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ be with your spirit.
Paul ends this letter similar to how he started it. He started it saying “Grace to you and peace." Here, he says, "grace... be with [you]."It means that he wants the grace of God to be with his readers as they go.
When we read Scripture, we are not reading it 24 hours a day. We read it for part of the day and then go live the rest of the day doing other things. Paul wants the
sustaining, sovereign grace of Jesus Christ to
stay with them throughout the rest of their daily life. And they need it, because his main recipients also suffer for the sake of the gospel and will eventually die for it. (source: John Piper, Future Grace)
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Applications from Philemon:
1. v4: One of the ways that Paul expressed love for Philemon and the others in his church was that
he prayed for them regularly, although they were in another city and he was in prison. Do you regularly pray for other believers -
whether you can see them or not - and
whether your circumstances are good or not?
2. v13: Being ministered to may seem like a very good thing, but
it is not always right to focus on who can help you in your trial if God would be
more honored by having them go somewhere else to pursue a different calling.
3. v13:
Secular work (in this context, seen as a slave serving a master)
is a legitimate calling. Don’t think that you have to be in full-time ministry in order to glorify God and serve Him.
4.
Center your friendships with other Christians on Christ. The friendships Paul had with these other servants (Epaphras, Aristarchus, etc.) were based in
advancing the gospel and
suffering for it.
Deep friendships involve camaraderie in a cause. If you have trouble forming deep friendships with other Christians,
question the basis of those friendships. Make sure that you are centering your friendships on Christ, not on surface-level worldly interests. This will also help you minister to them, and them to you.
5. vv18-19a: Would you ever
pay the consequences for another person’s sin just to restore them to another brother?
6. v21: Can it be said of you that when you are to do some form of service for another believer,
you will do more than what they ask? (I'm not saying this about me in the Philippines. :-) )
7. v22: Would you go to
great lengths to see or visit people who have benefited from your ministry, or who you have benefited from in their ministry? (Ditto. :-) )
"Eh, they say hind sight is 20/20. Well, they're right. It's behind me.
Let's say I can write by hand in any script:
