That real life music...

"Eh, they say hind sight is 20/20.  Well, they're right.  It's behind me.

Back for the third time - you know where to find me!

Hanging on the coat tail of Christ, who designed me -

Keep me off your brain.  In other words, don't mind me. ...

"We ain't in a dream world.  We're spitting that real life.

We live in the real world, and know just what it feels like.

So we're pressing in like steel spikes.

To stand in a fallen world, it don't feel nice.

Eh, even if you're rich or you've got a lot of cash, 

You're still not exempt as everybody's on the map.

We all feel the pressure, heavy burdens on our backs -

Every day, it's still hard, but we're learning like it's class."

- Trip Lee.

My Easter weekend and week was interesting.  My host from the Philippines came into town for a few days during his whirlwind tour of the US, between the end of his semester in law school and his graduation.  We went to some extra services with my church's host church for Holy Week.  It was good to see everyone there and more passionate than they usually are.  On Saturday, we had a Bible study that went late into the night.  Many people who attended the Bible study didn't sleep that night because we had a sunrise service for Easter.

I decided to skip the sunrise service because my still-recurring headaches and jaw pain have given me tremendous trouble sleeping and I was not sure how much sleep I would actually get during the last few hours of Saturday night.  Despite trying many kinds of treatments and sleeping arrangements, I slept through the night only once during a whole month.  During the day, I usually have a dull headache that gets worse as the day goes on, occasionally stabbing pains, pains that shoot around my whole jaw, and popping ears.  It's bad.  Theologically correct or not, I've told some people that everyone in hell has this condition.

So I woke up about an hour later and went to the church that I had visited last Easter.  It was great to be in the presence of almost 4000 other Christians who were passionately worshiping the one true God through songs that echoed Biblical truth.  It felt like going to a conference again.  After the service, I loaded up on books and spent time with a college friend who I had not seen since I visited the same church a year prior.

We shared prayer requests.  I asked him to pray for my career situation, specifically mentioning that I have a desire to do full-time missions in the Philippines but no definite calling on whether I should stay here or drop everything and go there.  He said he would pray for it.

The next day was Monday.  I was back at work.  During two-plus months of this pain, I had not even taken one day off from work, though I've had three emergency dental visits in the last three weeks.  The morning went like a usual morning, with a few meetings.  I let my boss know that I would need to step out in the afternoon for a dental appointment.  He was fine with it.  I started eating lunch at my desk, while still working, while my office mates were out on their lunch break.  I started hearing rumblings about some "1:00 meeting" which I had figured was for a specific project that some others on the team were working on.

Then 1:00 came.  In the middle of lunch, my boss called me into the HR office.  They told me that my performance had not improved enough since my review in January (although all marks on that review were officially good) and I could not work there anymore.  They were seeing my pain as an excuse rather than the root cause why my performance had not improved.  I explained this, but didn't bother to try fighting to keep my job.

I've really been wrestling with whether I should make this post public but anonymous on my blog or private for my Facebook friends.  This is not the first time I have lost my job.  Actually, it's the third.  The first two times, I was laid off for circumstances that were not my fault.  This time, it is officially my fault, though I think others should at least share some blame for it.  But I hate going to church and hearing "How's your job search?" instead of "Hi, how are you?" from so many of my friends.  So I've only told a few of them.

I'm also not sure whether or not I should try to fight to stay in this line of work or not.  The last place made me, occasionally, legitimately hate what I was doing for a living.  I have several choices now.  One is to look for another job - not preferable, but I'm starting to put feelers out anyway.  One is to start freelancing in hopes that it will get successful and I'll be able to live in the Philippines and keep doing it in the future.  One is to do paid work with a nonprofit or charity.  One is to become a missionary to the Philippines - and anyone who has read this blog long enough would know that I have a specific burden for that country.

During the past two weeks, I've mostly just been sleeping a lot.  I hope it is not laziness, but rather a legitimate need to rest after the pain had kept me awake every night for a month.  The pain has subsided to the point where I can function now, though my ears are still popping.  I've been staying in my house for several days at a time and rarely going out anywhere.  It feels like being a hermit.

My relationship with God has seemed distant since Easter.  Due to the pain, I haven't fasted recently; I will try to fast again soon.  And most days, I've woken up and gone straight to my computer to do research for this job hunt / career change / whatever this is going to be.  I've barely prayed about it at all and have barely been in the Word.  You can have a theology blog, be registered to attend another conference in a month, and have a relationship with God that is barely there at all.  I feel ready to worship, but without spending much time with Him - it seems more accurate that I am ready to let out emotion for emotion's sake and call it worship.

A question that keeps coming back to me is: If I stay in this line of work, does that show a lack of faith?  If I stay in America, does it show a lack of faith?  If I start another job that gives me only two weeks a year of vacation (standard in the US), I won't be able to go back to the Philippines until the end of 2013 - if the trip gets approved again.

On the other hand, a friend who is a missionary tweeted earlier this morning encouraging believers to sell all for Christ now.  Another friend who is leaving for South America as a full-time missionary in the summer told me that a trend in his missions organization is to  be an expatriate worker.  That is how a lot of missions to the unreached is being done.  I know several people who expatriated to the Philippines, though their reasons were related more to work than to missions.  There also seems to be a lot of options to teach at schools for missionary kids there, but that seems more like just supporting missions to me rather than being on the front lines.

I know my family wants me to stay in the corporate world, despite my failure there so far.  They don't want me to go and stay in the Philippines.  To many Americans, success equals success in the corporate arena.  To many Filipinos, the same is true.

I hope that whatever decision I make is legitimately surrendered to God and not based on unbelief or fear.  On the way home from work two Mondays ago, I was not crying or screaming at God as I had been after both of my layoffs in previous years.  I was peacefully surrendered to whatever God has for me next - holding my career and ambitions with an open hand and telling Him that I wanted Him to do what He wanted with it.  That's probably the most peace I have had in a while about my direction in life.

Surrender to God must not be a flash in the pan, decided in the moment and then forgotten about.  Whoever leaves anything or anyone for the sake of Christ will receive their reward in eternity:

"Then Peter said to Him, 'Behold, we have left everything and followed You; what then will there be for us?' And Jesus said to them, 'Truly I say to you, that you who have followed Me, in the regeneration when the Son of Man will sit on His glorious throne, you also shall sit upon twelve thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel.  And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or children or farms for My name’s sake, will receive many times as much, and will inherit eternal life.  But many who are first will be last; and the last, first.'"  (Matthew 19:27-30)

My copy of Let the Nations Be Glad arrived a few days ago.  I have read only a few pages in the preface so far and have tried to really dwell on what is being said:

"All the earth-shaking awesome forces unleashed on the world are released by the Lord Jesus Christ.  He reigns today.  He is in the control room of the universe.  He is the only Ultimate Cause; all the sins of man and machinations of Satan ultimately have to enhance the glory and kingdom of our Saviour.  This is true of our world today - in wars, famines, earthquakes, or the evil that apparently has the ascendancy.  We have become too enemy-conscious, and can over-do the spiritual warfare aspect of intercession.  We need to be more God-conscious, so that we can laugh the laugh of faith knowing that we have power over all the power of the enemy (Luke 10:19).  He has already lost control because of Calvary where the Lamb was slain.  What confidence and rest of heart this gives us as we face a world in turmoil and such spiritual need."
- Patrick Johnstone, Operation World.

Regardless of how we choose to promote Him, we must promote Him.  The Lamb will receive the full reward of His suffering.  Don't we want to be used in that great cause?

"9 After these things I looked, and behold, a great multitude which no one could count, from every nation and all tribes and peoples and tongues, standing before the throne and before the Lamb, clothed in white robes, and palm branches were in their hands; 10 and they cry out with a loud voice, saying,
   “Salvation to our God who sits on the throne, and to the Lamb.” 11 And all the angels were standing around the throne and around the elders and the four living creatures; and they fell on their faces before the throne and worshiped God, 12 saying,
   “Amen, blessing and glory and wisdom and thanksgiving and honor and power and might, be to our God forever and ever. Amen.”
 13 Then one of the elders answered, saying to me, “These who are clothed in the white robes, who are they, and where have they come from?” 14 I said to him, “My lord, you know.” And he said to me, “These are the ones who come out of the great tribulation, and they have washed their robes and made them white in the blood of the Lamb. 15 For this reason, they are before the throne of God; and they serve Him day and night in His temple; and He who sits on the throne will spread His tabernacle over them. 16 They will hunger no longer, nor thirst anymore; nor will the sun beat down on them, nor any heat; 17 for the Lamb in the center of the throne will be their shepherd, and will guide them to springs of the water of life; and God will wipe every tear from their eyes.”"
- Revelation 7:9-17.

Sunday is only a shadow.

Identities of a Christian Pilgrim in a Fallen World, Part 5

41.  I am seeking to sense the presence of God and to behold His beauty.  Although in my sin nature I hated Him, God has made Himself so sweet to me that I want to destroy every act and thought of disobedience in my life that keeps me from the boundless joys of knowing Him.  Knowing Him here on earth is like experiencing something of the joys of heaven as I walk in this fallen world.  "He has destined you to something better than a short-lived blessedness, to be enjoyed only in times of special earnestness and prayer and then to pass away as you returned to those duties in which the far greater part of life has to be spent." - Andrew Murray.   (Psalm 27:4)

42.  I am given assurance of my salvation based on the work that God is doing in my life.  He has not left me the same since my conversion.  The knowledge of Him is also experiential and felt; it is not just knowing facts about Him or believing the right things.  "The life of God in the soul authenticates itself. It brings with it its own evidence. Is it possible that a believer can be a subject of the quickening grace of the Holy Spirit, and not know it? Possess union with Christ, and not know it? The pardon of sin, and not know it? Communion with God, and not know it? Breathing after holiness, and not know it? Impossible!" - Octavius Winslow.  (1 John 3:14)

43.  I am more blessed when I have little wealth than an unconverted man when he is very materially rich.  All the world's wealth does is blind me.  If wealth distracts me from loving Christ, I would rather have nothing, because the Lord is a far greater blessing.  And a man who lives to acquire a great deal of wealth in this world and does not repent of his sins will have nothing when he spends eternity in hell.  "Paul was a prisoner, sick, bruised, and very poor.  But he rejoiced in the Lord and did not ask for more." - Dillon Chase, "Dive In".  (Psalm 37:16)

44.  I am upheld by the King of Glory as I go through trials in life and suffer for His name's sake.  As He continues to break me and rid me of idols, He gives me a progressively clearer picture that His grace is sufficient.  The word "sufficient" is beautiful because logicians relate it to the word "necessary".  "Necessary" means that something must be there.  "Sufficient" means that it is the only thing you need.  God describes His grace as sufficient.  "When through fiery trials thy pathway shall lie, My grace - all-sufficient - will be thy supply.  The flame shall not hurt thee; I only design: thy dross to consume, and thy gold to refine." - John Rippon.  (2 Corinthians 12:9; Psalm 66:8-10)

45.  I am constantly fighting in a spiritual battle for the truth of God to be passed down to the next generation.  Though it may seem that the false doctrines that many are teaching today are new, Biblical Christianity has faced false teaching throughout its history - and false prophets both before and since Christ.  God has always preserved His Word and allowed His truth to continue being passed to people yet unborn.  I have a responsibility for living out and upholding sound doctrine in my life, and not tolerating those who proclaim a different gospel.  (Psalm 22:30-31; Jeremiah 14:14; Revelation 2:20)

46.  I am living in a war and thus called to live a wartime lifestyle.  Far from the romantic, white picket fence "simple life", the wartime lifestyle requires sacrifice, discipline, and support from the other troops on my side.  As Martin Luther said, "A faith that costs nothing and demands nothing is worth nothing."  I must truly give up the things in this life that I consider mine and chase Christ relentlessly.  If I do that, the Lord has a certain promise to me: I will find Him.  (Mark 8:35; Jeremiah 29:13; paraphrases from Don't Waste Your Life by John Piper)

47.  I am seeking to glorify God, so I cannot be a habitual self-promoter.  When I seek glory for myself, I eventually must realize that it is not mine to seek - and repent.  An infinitely faithful God has loved me - a sinner, who can only praise Him inconsistently at best - with an everlasting love.  He deserves all of my praise.  "Self cannot possibly exist in this atmosphere; all along it must be crucified ... Have no illusion about this. If you think it is a life in which you are going to make a great name, and be praised, and one in which you are going to be made wonderful, you may as well stop at this point and go back to the beginning, for he who would enter by this gate must say goodbye to self." - Martyn Lloyd-Jones.  (Psalm 115:1)

48.  I am to praise the Lord for all of my life, and even with my dying breath.  He is forever worthy of that.  "Praise is the rehearsal of our eternal song.  By grace we learn to sing, and in glory we continue to sing.  What will some of you do when you get to Heaven, if you go on grumbling all the way?  Do not hope to get to heaven in that style.  But begin now to bless the name of the Lord." - Charles Spurgeon.  (Psalm 146:2)

49.  I am able to see that the Lord really is all I need.  Even when my work produces nothing and I have no possessions, it becomes more apparent to me that the Lord is my source of strength.  "When our needs are permitted to grow to an extremity, and all visible hopes fail, then to have relief given wonderfully enhances the price of such a mercy." - John Flavel.  (Habakkuk 3:17-18; Isaiah 41:17-18)

50.  I am able to glorify God by obeying earthly rulers who do not love Him.  God allows me to not be afraid when those around me, including those in political power, do not please the Lord.  In areas of the world where He is not being worshiped, He will draw men to Himself from every tribe, tongue, and nation.  All leaders, including those who are not believers, are appointed by God.  I am concerned when I see God's law being broken, but God will act as He sees fit.  As for me, my responsibility is to commit my way to the Lord and delight in Him.  "I take my share in earthly politics, earthly labor, even earthly pain.  But let's be clear.  I am no Earthling.  I'm an alien." - Lecrae.  (Psalm 119:126; Psalm 37:5; Revelation 5:9)

The Glory of God in Loving the Bride of Christ, Part 2

 These are the full notes of my exegesis of Philemon in preparation for the lesson I taught in the Philippines.  In the lesson, I only mentioned the points of this that specifically relate to loving other believers.  Here's the bonus material. :-)

1 Paul, a prisoner of Christ Jesus, and Timothy our brother, 
This is a "prison epistle", and the only one of Paul's letters where he introduces himself as a "prisoner of Christ", in prison for preaching the gospel. I couldn't find anything that said conclusively whether Timothy was also in prison at this time. To Philemon our beloved brother and fellow worker, Philemon was a Christian ministering in the church at Colossae who was not in prison. He was wealthy enough to own at least one slave, Onesimus. Some commentators think Philemon was a pastor.

2 and to Apphia our sister,
This is the only place in the Bible where Apphia is mentioned. This may have been Philemon's wife.

and to Archippus our fellow soldier,
Archippus was also addressed briefly in the book of Colossians(4:17). In that context, Paul mentioned him right after he gave a greeting to the church at Laodicea; Archippus was the only person specifically addressed there and may have been a church leader. Some historical traditions say that he was one of the 72 disciples appointed by Christ in Luke 10. Some historical accounts also suggest that Philemon, Apphia, and Archippus were all martyred under the persecution of Nero.

and to the church in your house:
The church at Colosse was a house church that met in Philemon’s house. He opened his home to allow his church to meet there. Meeting in homes was common in the early church; church buildings did not come until much later.

3 Grace to you ... from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.
Grace envelopes the teaching of all of Paul's letters, due to its centrality in the Christian faith; Christians are all recipients of it. God has no problems in Himself that we can fix, and there is nothing that we can offer Him. His responses to us are gifts of His grace.

... and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.
We have peace with God through Jesus Christ, and by peace, the blessings that result from grace come to us. Both grace and peace are only from God the Father through Jesus Christ. (source: Matthew Henry)

4 I thank my God always, making mention of you in my prayers,
Elsewhere in this book, Paul gives congratulations and commendations regarding Philemon and the others that he mentions based on their faith. However, he still prays for them. No Christian who is still alive is beyond the need for prayer.

5 because I hear of your love and of the faith which you have toward the Lord Jesus and toward all the saints;
"I hear of" means that Philemon himself may not have been the one telling Paul about this. The love Philemon showed for the saints and their faith toward Christ had a testimony that reached beyond their city. "Toward all the saints" does not limit Philemon's (or our) love to only believers, but it shows a deeper bond of love between believers that we have in Christ, regardless of whether these saints are Jew, Gentile, slave, free, rich, poor, or any other possible category.

6 and I pray that the fellowship of your faith may become effective through the knowledge of every good thing which is in you for Christ’s sake. 
But wasn't it already becoming effective?  "Fellowship" and “effective" mean that the faith was becoming manifested to men (source: John Calvin). Faith communicates itself by good works. "Every good thing which is in you" does not refer to good things that Philemon inherently had in himself, but to things that are there because of his faith in Christ ("for Christ's sake"). This is not to give glory to Philemon, but to give glory to Christ.

7 For I have come to have much joy and comfort in your love, because the hearts of the saints have been refreshed through you, brother.
Whether he is the pastor of the church or not, Philemon is ministering to the saints in his local church. Nowhere in Scripture is it mentioned that Paul actually had ever gone to Colosse, although one of his messengers, Tychicus, carried this letter and the epistle to the Colossians to Colosse. Paul had been to Ephesus, 100 km away, and was imprisoned there. So Paul has joy that someone he most likely has not seen, who lives in a place that he has most likely never visited, is serving the believers in this local church in a Gentile region (Asia Minor), which is part of the early stages of Christianity spreading around the world and outside the Jewish people.

8 Therefore, though I have enough confidence in Christ to order you to do what is proper, 9 yet for love's sake I rather appeal to you - since I am such a person as Paul, the aged, and now also a prisoner of Christ Jesus -
In 1 Corinthians 8, Paul addresses whether Christians can eat meat sacrificed to idols. He says that we can, but not all Christians have this knowledge, and less spiritually mature Christians would be tripped up by that. He says that he will not exercise this liberty around them and gives us an instruction to not cause our brothers to stumble. So he lays down his liberty. In this passage, Paul has the authority and confidence to order Philemon what to do. He was an apostle and mentions that he is "aged", probably at least 50 years old when he wrote this. And he has lived his Christian life preaching the gospel and facing much opposition. But in the verses to follow, Paul is going to lay down his authority to command his brother. He is not going to give a command, but an appeal, to Philemon. He is also writing this letter from a distance and may not know all of the circumstances involved.

10 I appeal to you for my child Onesimus, whom I have begotten in my imprisonment,
"My child" does not mean that Onesimus was Paul’s biological son. "Child" here is a term of endearment. It is referring to Onesimus as a spiritual child. Onesimus and Paul may not have met until Paul was imprisoned in Rome and shared the gospel with Onesimus. You can't have faith in the gospel without first hearing it, so one who gives instruction in it is like a parent (source: John Calvin). "Begotten" means that it was a result of Paul's ministry, not by Paul’s power.  God is the one who saves.

who formerly was useless to you, but now is useful both to you and to me.
He was useless (a pun on his name - "useful") because he stole from his master. He was also useless to Philemon in terms of Christian fellowship because he was not yet a Christian. He is useful now because he is now a Christian, has left that life of sin, and can now be an honest servant. He is also a brother in Christ now who shares a bond with Philemon that they did not have when he stole.

12 I have sent him back to you in person, that is, sending my very heart,
Onesimus is most likely going back with Tychicus because slave-catchers in their day would have intercepted him on the way if he had traveled alone (source: John MacArthur). "My very heart" is also an appeal because it implies that if Philemon rejected the appeal, he was rejecting Paul's heart (source: John Calvin).

13 whom I wished to keep with me, so that on your behalf he might minister to me in my imprisonment for the gospel;
Here, Paul was looking out for the interests of others, not his own interests. He wanted Onesimus to stay near him in prison and minister to him, but he wanted more than that for Onesimus, an escaped slave rightfully owned by Philemon to go back to his master.

14 but without your consent I did not want to do anything, so that your goodness would not be, in effect, by compulsion but of your own free will.
He wanted Philemon to obey him willingly, not begrudgingly. Paul is sending Onesimus back, with the hope that Philemon will take him back. Philemon may have been inclined to see this as Paul rejecting Onesimus, "return to sender; I'm not interested in keeping him around". Or Philemon may have seen Onesimus wrong as too significant to accept taking him back.  However, Paul is appealing to Philemon, who he has already commended for his love.

15 For perhaps he for this reason separated from you for a while, that you might have him back forever,
Onesimus went to meet Paul in Rome. Here, Paul is suggesting that the ultimate reason why Onesimus separated from Philemon is so that Philemon might have him back forever. But "forever" means beyond this lifetime. Onesimus and Philemon were not always brothers in Christ, but now they are. The text doesn't seem to say (in English) whether Paul says "he for this reason separated from you", meaning that Onesimus was intentionally doing this, or whether "this reason" means that Onesimus wanted to just run away, but God had a different purpose behind all of it. Calvin thinks it was the latter, pointing to the example of the trials Joseph went through in the book of Genesis. (Thoughts?)

16 no longer as a slave, but more than a slave, a beloved brother, especially to me, but how much more to you, both in the flesh and in the Lord.
Philemon only knew Onesimus as someone who worked for him and was dishonest at that. There was no spiritually-based relationship between the two of them. Now that has changed. Paul knows firsthand, from Onesimus' being there for him while he was in prison, that Onesimus is a beloved brother to him now. Paul’s understanding in v. 15 is that Onesimus only left Philemon "for awhile", but if Philemon receives Onesimus back, Onesimus will stay and serve him with a heart that God has changed and a repentance over his sin. Also, Onesimus never worked for Paul as his slave. Paul does not know firsthand how Onesimus served Philemon before he was a Christian. Philemon might be the one person who would see the big change in Onesimus' life ("how much more") more than anyone else. Paul claims both Onesimus and Philemon as brothers in Christ, linking the two. Onesimus was already a "brother... in the flesh" to Philemon (not sure: were they actually biological brothers or only living in the same house / of the same lineage?), but now, more importantly, he is a brother in Christ to him.

17 If then you regard me as a partner, accept him as you would me.
Paul urges Philemon to accept Onesimus back because of the evidence in v.16 that he is now a beloved brother. "partner" refers to partnership in the gospel. "Accept him" - a repentant sinner showing genuine evidence of salvation - "as you would me" - a former persecutor of the church who killed Christians but has repented of even that. Philemon has already accepted Paul over a sin that could have had Philemon killed if he ever fell back into it.

18 But if he has wronged you in any way or owes you anything, charge that to my account; 19 I, Paul, am writing this with my own hand, I will repay it
This is the only place in the letter where Paul refers directly or indirectly to Onesimus’ sin. Paul takes the consequences for Onesimus' sin. Onesimus is a runaway slave, and if he has already spent the money, he can't pay it back. Paul has agreed to repay it himself so that the loss of money consequent from the sin would not be a problem for Philemon. "I... am writing this with my own hand" emphasizes that Paul is really the one writing this.

(not to mention to you that you owe to me even your own self as well).
The Bible does not say this directly, but Philemon may have been saved under Paul's ministry. This is a parenthetical statement in some translations, such as the NASB (this one).

20 Yes, brother, let me benefit from you in the Lord; refresh my heart in Christ.
The context here is Paul's appeal that Philemon accept Onesimus back. “Accept[ing] [Onesimus] as you would me" (v. 17) would be a benefit and refreshment to Paul. It would benefit Paul to see this relationship between Philemon and Onesimus restored more than it would for Onesimus to stay with Paul (vv. 13, 16).  This is a different kind of benefit and refreshment "... in the Lord... in Christ". The gospel of Christ changed Paul's heart so that he would see Onesimus' being away from him (and possibly never coming back to him) as a "benefit” and "refreshment".

21 Having confidence in your obedience, I write to you, since I know that you will do even more than what I say.
Paul appealed to Philemon rather than commanding him (v.9), but still considered that if Philemon followed through on this appeal it would be "obedience" (v. 21). Paul had confidence that Philemon would obey him and accept Onesimus back. He knew that Philemon would do more than simply accept him back.

22 At the same time also prepare me a lodging, for I hope that through your prayers I will be given to you. 
Although Paul was in prison, he had faith that he would not stay there for the rest of his life. He hoped to see Philemon in Colosse. If he had gone, he would have been able to see whether Philemon accepted Onesimus back and what kind of role he had given him.

23 Epaphras, my fellow prisoner in Christ Jesus, greets you,
Epaphras preached the gospel to his fellow Colossians (his own people) and came to Paul in Rome with a favorable account of the Colossian church while Paul was in prison there. In Colossians 4:12, Paul tells the church at Colosse that Epaphras is "always laboring earnestly for you in his prayers, that you may stand perfect and fully assured in all the will of God... he has a deep concern for you and for those who are in Laodicea and Hierapolis." In Colossians 1, Paul reminds the church there that they heard of the gospel (v. 5) and understood the “grace of God in truth" (v. 7), which they learned from Epaphras (v.8), who Paul calls "our beloved fellow-bond-servant, who is a faithful servant of Christ on our [Paul and Timothy's] behalf."

24 as do Mark, Aristarchus, Demas, Luke, my fellow workers.
Mark: Historical accounts are divided over whether this was the same Mark who wrote the book of Mark. This Mark was definitely with Paul on his missionary journeys and apparently with him during his imprisonment at Rome.
Aristarchus: A Macedonian from Thessalonica. In Acts 20, Aristarchus had accompanied Paul on a missionary journey from Greece through Macedonia to Syria. Aristarchus was also on board a ship with Paul in Acts 27 when they were shipwrecked. When Paul wrote to the Colossians, Aristarchus was in prison.
Demas: Demas was with Paul during his first imprisonment in Rome. He also sends his greetings in Colossians. But in 2 Timothy, Paul writes that Demas forsook him, "having loved this present world". John Calvin wrote of Demas, "And if one of Paul’s assistants, having become weary and discouraged, was afterwards drawn aside by the vanity of the world, let no man reckon too confidently on the zeal of a single year; but, considering how large a portion of the journey still remains to be accomplished, let him pray to God for steadfastness."
Luke: A physician who wrote the Gospel of Luke and the Acts of the Apostles, possibly one of the Seventy.

25 The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ be with your spirit.
Paul ends this letter similar to how he started it. He started it saying “Grace to you and peace."  Here, he says, "grace... be with [you]."It means that he wants the grace of God to be with his readers as they go. When we read Scripture, we are not reading it 24 hours a day. We read it for part of the day and then go live the rest of the day doing other things. Paul wants the sustaining, sovereign grace of Jesus Christ to stay with them throughout the rest of their daily life. And they need it, because his main recipients also suffer for the sake of the gospel and will eventually die for it. (source: John Piper, Future Grace)

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Applications from Philemon:
1. v4: One of the ways that Paul expressed love for Philemon and the others in his church was that he prayed for them regularly, although they were in another city and he was in prison. Do you regularly pray for other believers - whether you can see them or not - and whether your circumstances are good or not?

2. v13: Being ministered to may seem like a very good thing, but it is not always right to focus on who can help you in your trial if God would be more honored by having them go somewhere else to pursue a different calling.

3. v13: Secular work (in this context, seen as a slave serving a master) is a legitimate calling.  Don’t think that you have to be in full-time ministry in order to glorify God and serve Him.

4.  Center your friendships with other Christians on Christ.  The friendships Paul had with these other servants (Epaphras, Aristarchus, etc.) were based in advancing the gospel and suffering for it. Deep friendships involve camaraderie in a cause. If you have trouble forming deep friendships with other Christians, question the basis of those friendships. Make sure that you are centering your friendships on Christ, not on surface-level worldly interests. This will also help you minister to them, and them to you.

5. vv18-19a: Would you ever pay the consequences for another person’s sin just to restore them to another brother?

6. v21: Can it be said of you that when you are to do some form of service for another believer, you will do more than what they ask? (I'm not saying this about me in the Philippines. :-) )

7. v22: Would you go to great lengths to see or visit people who have benefited from your ministry, or who you have benefited from in their ministry? (Ditto. :-) )

The Glory of God in Loving the Bride of Christ, Part 1

Several days ago, I returned from the Philippines via about 20 hours of flying and more than 2 days without sleep.  I was questioning myself, especially after I came back, about why I would ever leave the Philippines.  I find it, in a way, disobedient to God that I could not stay.  As I drove around my town yesterday, I was asking myself why I came back.  Callings to a specific geographic location are rare.  When my health finally readjusts to this much colder weather, I want to head back to the trail for another time of prayer and fasting: for each person that I ministered to there and for how I may be able to make it back as soon as possible.

Although there was a great deal of excitement in finally going on this trip, some of the highlights were the retreat last weekend in Subic, with a group of about 17 college students and young professionals, and the visit to my sponsored children the next day.  One of my hosts invited me to speak at one session of the retreat.  I had prepared a lesson which went verse-by-verse through 1 John 4:7-21 and the whole book of Philemon.  After a test run of it in the States, I dropped most of the Philemon portion, though I plan to post it here later.

Here is the first part of my notes from the study, "The Glory of God in Loving the Bride of Christ":

Who is God?  Who does He think He is to command us to follow Him? Some Psalms keep repeating “glory" - but what is "the glory of God" anyway? How has He shown this through creation and throughout eternity? And why should we care about it when movies, video games, trolling, etc., seem more fun in the here and now? Why would we "waste our lives" (not really, but some people think so) on having a radical vision for glorifying God locally or among the nations?

The reason is that God has a radical vision for glorifying Himself throughout the world and has already seen to it that the universe brings Him glory and obeys Him. Literally everything in all of creation was made for one purpose: to glorify Jesus Christ.  Not one molecule, atom, or subatomic particle exists against this purpose.  Not one of them rebels against His will or is beyond the scope of His power.  Colossians 1:15-17 says, “He [Christ] is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn of all creation. For by Him all things were created, both in the heavens and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities – all things have been created through Him and for Him. He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together.” See also Hebrews 1:1-12.

I think many people our age don't get words like “infinite"... no one can really understand it, but most people won’t even start. Flippancy toward God's commands often results from a view of God that is too small and not powerful enough. I just don't know how so many people who are Christians can read the Bible or read theologians with a high view of God and be anything but stunned and awed by what they see.

God’s glory on earth:
1.  Psalms 138:4-6
2.  Psalms 104:24-32

As someone made in His image, you are a work of God.

God’s glory in the heavens (universe):
1.  Psalms 19:1
2.  Psalms 89:5-18
3.  Psalms 86:8-10
4.  Isaiah 40:25-26
5.  Job 38:31-35

God’s glory in heaven:
1.  Psalms 24:7
2.  Psalms 29:9

It is mind-blowing that a God this glorious would want anything to do with us!

How man relates in all of this:
1.  Psalms 8:3-4
2.  Psalms 19:14
3.  Psalms 33:6-12
4.  Psalm 139 (all)
5.  Psalms 148:13
6.  Psalms 65:5-8
7.  Psalm 67 (all)
8.  Psalms 86:11-12

The Psalms were written by people who really did follow God and praise Him. We can’t “walk in [His] truth” if we are not really His. So it is critical for us to know whether we are His. 1 John is written primarily so that professing Christians will be able to examine themselves to see if they are truly in the faith and to see whether they are really in fellowship with God (1:6, 5:13). It is written in the context of a false teaching called Gnosticism. Gnostics thought they had secrets for understanding the truth that other Christians did not have. They also taught that it doesn't matter what you do with your physical body. So even if you live a lifestyle of sin, that doesn't matter to them; they still consider you a believer. John countered this with the following tests of whether someone is really saved:  (This is paraphrased from an article I read at Grace to You.)

1. Have you enjoyed fellowship with Christ and the Father? In other words, do you love spending time with God? (1 John 1:2-3)

2. Do you walk in darkness (1 John 1:6), a persistent style of life that is sinful (1 John 3:6-8)? If you do, you are not saved. In other words, are you sensitive to sin?

3. Do you keep the commandments of Jesus (1 John 2:3)? The one who says he walks in a way pleasing to Christ must walk (style of life) in the same matter that He did (1 John 2:6).

4. Do you love other Christians? (1 John 2:10-11, 3:10, 3:14, 4:21)  Do you love them with "deed and truth" and not just "word or with tongue"? (1 John 3:18) Have your sins been forgiven, and are you overcoming the evil one? (1 John 2:12-14)

5. Do you love the world or the things in it, the lust of the flesh, lust of the eyes, and pride of life (1 John 2:15-16)? A true Christian does not.

6. Do you eagerly await Christ’s return? (1 John 3:2-3)

7. Do you see a decreasing pattern of sin in your life? (1 John 3:4-10)

8. Do you experience the Holy Spirit's ministry? (1 John 2:20, 26-27) The Holy Spirit illuminates Scripture so that you can understand it, allows you to minister to others, allows you to have meaningful worship, and produces the fruit of the Spirit in your life.

9. Do you suffer opposition for your faith? (1 John 3:13)

10. Do you discern true teaching from false teaching? (1 John 4:6)

11. Do you confess that Jesus is the Son of God? (1 John 4:15)

12. Do you experience answered prayer? (1 John 5:14-15)

For this lesson, I will focus on one of the “tests of salvation”, “Do you love other Christians?”, described in 1 John 4:7-21.

(Section 1) 7 Beloved, let us love one another,
John uses "Beloved" repeatedly throughout this book as evidence that he loves those to whom he writes. The word he uses for both "beloved “and "love" is based on "agape" - "unconditional love". Back in chapter 1, verses 1-4, John distinguishes between "we" and "you". Here, he uses "us" to say, "Let me love you” and "Let you love me".

For love is from God;
Love is in God's very nature and character. Christ serves as the perfect example of unconditional love because of how He lived His life on earth and bore the penalty for our sins in His death.

and everyone who loves is born of God.
Here, we need to distinguish again between different kinds of love. An unbeliever can say, "I love you", to another person (believer or not). An unbeliever can serve and demonstrate sacrifice. But John is using "agape" again. He is saying that everyone who loves unconditionally is born of God. Earlier in the verse he said "love one another".

8 The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love.
This is almost the contrapositive of verse 7b: someone who "is born of God" "know[s] God". v.7 says that "love is from God"; v.8 says "God is love". "God is love" describes God's nature and essence and where His will and works come from (source: Henry). Several times in 1 John, John uses phrases starting with "God is" to describe God's nature.

9 By this the love of God was manifested in us, that God has sent His only begotten Son into the world so that we might live through Him.
“This” is referring to something later in this verse. Christ was sent into the world so that we might live through Him. Christ retains the character of the Father; Hebrews 1:3 refers to Him as “the exact representation of His being”. We can infer that Christ had a loving character as well, as we look at (for example) His prayer for us in Gethsemane. Love is the most obvious sign to the world of the character of God. It is not doctrinal correctness, because people in the world don’t believe the Bible. It is not morality, because the world will see that as denying yourself of a good time and “Why would I want to do that?” God sent His only begotten Son into the world to die for people who hated Him. This is the ultimate expression of love. Christ even loved His enemies, but how precious was the love between Him and His disciples when they faced all sorts of opposition?

10 In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins.
In our sinful nature, we could not love God because He hated everything we were doing (sin) and He stood contrary to it. When Christ came to earth, even people that He healed were in the crowd yelling, “Crucify Him!” There was nothing that we could do to make God love us because He sees even the good deeds of unsaved people as “filthy rags” in Isaiah 53. If you cannot give something filthy as a gift to an earthly king and expect him to accept it, how much more is that true of God? God, who gives perfectly unconditional love, had to initiate love for us, and He demonstrated His love for us by sending His Son Jesus Christ to die for our sins. He sent His Son to this world in a body (Christ gave up His omnipresence to take on a physical body), to live the perfect life that we could never live and die the perfect death that we could never die.

“Propitiation” means “atoning sacrifice”. Before Christ, the Jews had to make sacrifices for their sins. But they had to keep doing that throughout their lives. But when Christ died, His sacrifice was sufficient to pay for everyone’s sins, once for all, and efficient to pay for our sins once for all.

11 Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.
Here, John uses “Beloved” again, based on that root word, “agape”. “If God so loved us” – “If God loved us to this extent,” sacrificing His own Son for us – don’t miss the significance of that! Verse 10 showed us that God’s love for us caused Him to sacrifice His perfect Son for all of these people that were giving Him filthy rags. The Greek word for “ought” means “are obligated”. We have to. But this commandment is not burdensome. “One another” means that this, again, is a reciprocal action. Based on the context, this is between believers. I have to love you. You have to love me. But if you do not love me, and in response I do not love you either, both of us have sinned. We should not make our love for another person conditional on the other person loving us. And again, the word for love that is used here is indeed for ongoing, unconditional love.

12 No one has seen God at any time;
Even in theophanies, God did not allow Himself to be seen, because He is such a glorious being that even the seraphim around His throne cover their eyes to shield themselves from Him. It is ridiculous to say things like “I want to see God’s face today.” The seraphim are completely sinless and supernaturally strengthened to endure being in His presence. We are sinful, fallen creatures who would curse ourselves like Isaiah did when He saw someone who was probably the pre-incarnate Christ on His throne in Isaiah 6. God did not allow Moses to see His face either, only His back.

if we love one another, God abides in us, and His love is perfected in us.
This does not seem very connected to the first half of this verse, but it is the same sentence. But if we love one another, we reflect the character of God, and love is the first part of the fruit of the Spirit in Galatians 5. “Abides” is also translated “remains” or “stays”. “Perfected” also means “brought to an end” or “completed”. Love is perfected not by what you think about, but what you do. Thinking about helping or serving someone should not be a rewarding experience to you in and of itself, because they have not benefited from the fact that you thought about them.

13 By this we know that we abide in Him, and He in us, because He has given us of His Spirit.
The first part of this verse that destroys the arguments of the Catholic church and many other denominations and teachers. It says “by this we know”, not “by this we think” or “by this we might.” You can know that you are saved and have assurance of it. First John also has a verse that says that “these words are written so that you may know you have eternal life”, the thesis statement of 1 John. You can also know whether you abide in Christ, whether you are living moment by moment in the will of God, obeying Him. We learn from v.12 that He abides in us if we love one another. We learn from this verse that both He abides in us and we abide in Him because of the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit indwells us, illuminates Scripture to us, convicts us of sin, and gives us spiritual gifts.

14 We have seen and testify that the Father has sent the Son to be the Savior of the world.
There are two parts to this: “We have seen… that the Father has sent the Son to be the Savior of the world” and “We… testify that the Father has sent the Son to be the Savior of the world.” In the Greek this verse starts with “And”. We “have seen” – looked upon – the Son as the Savior of the world. We have experienced His saving grace and power for ourselves. It’s not all in our heads, but in our lives. “Testify” – we “bear witness to” it, or “are bearing witness to” it – this is a lifestyle of telling others that the Father has sent the Son to be the Savior of the world.

(Section 2) 15 Whoever confesses that Jesus is the Son of God, God abides in him, and he in God.
The word “confesses” here means “to speak the same”. You are speaking about it. In this day, speaking about it could carry a very high cost because many early believers died for their faith because they would not worship Caesar as Lord. The confession here is that “Jesus is the Son of God”. There is nothing in ourselves that we are confessing here.

16 We have come to know and have believed the love which God has for us.
The verbs here are past tense. At some point, we came to know God’s love and believed it.  Initially in our depraved condition, we would not know or believe this, but at some point that changed.

God is love, and the one who abides in love abides in God, and He in us.
He repeats “God is love” again and says that if you abide (or “are abiding”) in love you abide in God, and Him in you. This is because God’s character (“is love”) is reflected in you.

17 By this, love is perfected with us, so that we may have confidence in the day of judgment; because as He is, so also are we in this world.
You may have confidence in the day of judgment because God is progressively conforming you to be more like Him. Again, “perfected” carries with it the notion of “completed”. The day of judgment takes place after the end of your life. Your confidence will not be in yourself, but in the perfect work of Christ, which shows through the fruit that is borne in your life. “This world” refers to this world system. We are supposed to function within it and go out in it to reflect the love of Christ. This is not a call for us to live our whole lives away from unbelievers, but in fact we are supposed to be around them.

18 There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love.
Which kind of fear is John talking about? Is he saying, “There is no fear in love, so go skydiving without a parachute”? Is he saying, “There is no fear in love, so I’ll do something crazy to impress this girl”? Is he even saying, “There is no fear in love, so we don’t need to fear God anymore”? No to all of those. John says “fear involves punishment”. This is a clue on what kind of fear this is. The love of God is perfect and removes our fear that involves punishment.

“Punishment” here is not referring to hell. You are not perfected in love if you see yourself as just a slave of God who must obey the Master and fears getting His discipline if you disobey Him. (source: Calvin)  Because then, love is not the motivation of your obedience. Fear is, and fear is enslaving, keeping you from freely being made complete in the love of God.

19 We love, because He first loved us.
He loved us unconditionally and showed that by sending His Son to save us. This is why we love. It is in response to what He has already done.

20 If someone says, "I love God", and hates his brother, he is a liar; for the one who does not love his brother whom he has seen, cannot love God whom he has not seen.
Many people who are self-righteous emphasize their own love for God, look down on those who are not as “spiritually mature” as they are, and envy people who are spiritually “above” them.  They want to get to the top spiritually. This verse says that they do not really love God, they are liars, and they are not really Christians. But this is not only talking about people who are self-righteous. This is talking about any professing Christian who confesses with their mouth that they love God and hates their “brother”. Although the Greek word for “brother” here just means “brother”, it is metaphoric. “His brother” is not a physical brother. It means a brother in the faith – a genuine believer. It goes along with the understanding that other books in the Bible present about a “family of God”. “He is a liar” is another indictment against this false believer, because God never sins; therefore, God never lies; therefore, this person does not reflect the character of God; therefore, this person is not a Christian.

This “has seen” / “has not seen” language parallels with an earlier event in John’s life. In John 20, after Jesus was raised from the dead, John and the other disciples saw the risen Lord before Thomas did. Thomas was not with them when they first saw Him, and Thomas would not believe that Jesus rose from the dead until he saw Him and touched Him. Jesus said to Thomas in John 20:29, with the other disciples (including John) present, “Because you have seen Me, have you believed? Blessed are they who did not see, and yet believed.” If you see another Christian, someone who genuinely believes in Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, you see someone who reflects the character of God (however imperfectly!) to you and others. If you do not love them, this verse is saying that you cannot truly say that you love God either, because God’s love is manifested in the people who love Him and reflect His character.

21 And this commandment we have from Him, that the one who loves God should love his brother also.
This summarizes the previous discussion. “This commandment” could also be translated as “this injunction” or “this order”. What is “this commandment”? That “the one who loves God should love his brother also”. If you really do love God, you really will love fellow believers. This is a commandment “from Him” – from the same God who created the entire universe for His glory, and it obeys Him. If you sin against this God by breaking this commandment to love your brother in the faith, you sin against someone much more glorious than any ruler on this earth.

Practical Application: Lecrae's "Rebel Intro"

Many songs are very rich with practical truth that needs to be applied, not just heard. It's easy to hear a song with deep truth and go fast over it from one song to the next. Maybe the song will get stuck in our heads, but sometimes it stays there because it is catchy.

So, because Scripture commands us in James to be a doer of the word and not only a hearer of it, I would like to dive in on a song that has affected me multiple times since I first heard it: Lecrae's "Rebel Intro". As Voice said in "Whatever It Takes", "So now let's make this thing practical, since I am convinced this is God's Word and factual / but not merely a list of facts and features; they are truths that inform for all [of] what belief is." He said this of Scripture, so I will not say that the words of a song are divinely inspired. However, the songs can show us how we can apply truth that is divinely inspired.

Whether teaching us in preaching, singing, rapping, writing, or ministering where life exists, teachers who teach falsely will come under greater condemnation than those who follow them. Similarly, those of us who have heard more truth and refused to live it out have committed more disobedience against God than those who have heard less of the truth. So let's dive in and apply this.

"I'm in rebellion"

What kind of rebellion? The rest will explain.

"Jesus was a rebel, a renegade, outlaw

A sanctified troublemaker but He never sinned, naw"

Jesus was a rebel because He never sinned. Most people define "rebel" by whether we rebel against cultural norms. Criminals are "rebels" because most people believe practically that people are basically good and criminals somehow act against their basically good nature when they break the laws of the land. More conservative people think that people with multicolored hair or a lot of tattoos are "rebels" because they rebel against society's definition of a clean appearance. But Romans 3:10 says that all have sinned and rebelled against God. Christ, as God in human flesh, was by definition a rebel against the society around Him on earth.

"and He lived His life by a different set of Rules

the culture ain't approve so you know they had to bruise Him "

Secular society's rules today tend to base themselves around either 1) living for yourself, or 2) living for others but leaving God out of it. The former are all about pursuing their own happiness by having as much money, power, toys, work, leisure, sex, and other treasures of this world as they can. The latter tend to gravitate toward causes of goodwill but emphasize service to their fellow man more than God. That is living for the glory of others, not the glory of God.

Let me spin it another way for Christians: Many church people (not all are Christians) do not have a Biblical understanding of their new relationship to law. One group is antinomians: "We are under grace now. Throw the law out. Let's do what we want." Another group is legalists, who make their own set of rules, usually starting off with Scripture but leading into absurd applications that don't really fit and forcing them on others. This has a strong moralistic component and often produces outward obedience without a change in heart.

Jesus' set of rules was different because the culture around Him focused on obeying the Mosaic law. Among religious people, obedience to that law was the norm. But Jesus revealed that the hearts of the culture around Him were sinful toward God; what they were doing to get close to God was not good enough, because they still had sin. Perhaps He showed this most notably in the Sermon on the Mount, in several concrete applications of "Love your neighbor as yourself", an old law from Deuteronomy that may have seemed vague. Hating someone was on the same level as killing them; who would have thought? And culture tended not to follow Him; most settled back into "This is how we have always defined and done righteousness", while missing the entire picture.

"that's the way they do man, they swear they so gangsta

everyone the same, everybody do the same stuff

tattoos, piercings, smokin' up and drinking, money and sex plus them extravagant weekends"

Rebellion against God is the norm in society. It is only expressed in different ways and to different extents. I'm not trying to say that getting a tattoo or getting a piercing is right or wrong; that is not my focus in writing this. But most of society rebels against God in ways that are culturally acceptable. They live for the weekends when they can get drunk and enjoy the fruits of their hard work. Or they spend themselves at work in order to become thought of as great in their field or just to have more money. Or they are too lazy to contribute anything to society. These are all different ways to rebel against God.

"man if that's the high life I'll puff puff pass that

you live evaporated like missing a gas cap

I guess I'm passed that; I am in rebellion"

A Christian should rebel against the world's standards of how to live life and live by God's. But do so humbly. "I'm in rebellion" does not mean "Look at how holy I am." It means "It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives within me. And the life which I lived in the flesh..." - even if that life meant looking to your own self-righteousness and using that to please God instead of repenting of that and having faith in the finished work of Christ to please God - "I live by faith in the Son of God" - and His present and future grace! - "Who loved me and gave Himself for me." Obey Christ and love Him because He is all you will ever have and all you will ever need.

"I'd rather have a dollar in my pocket than a million

I'm scared to worship money, and my wants over Elyon"

This line strikes me the most of any in this song right now. I'm a young professional with minimal bills and almost 5 years of working full-time. Even though I give more than ten percent of my income to my church and I also give to missions and charity, that giving is not sacrificial. It is out of abundance. I can't imagine being someone who lives for the kingdom of God as a full-time missionary and has to really trust God for their provisions. I like being able to go to the ATM, take more money out than I may need, and see that balance keep going up. Can it be said that I love money?

"I'll remain a rebel while the rest of them just carry on

this is what I live for, this the hill I'm buried on"

The rest are carrying on because they are opposed to the gospel message lived out in you. What you live for is not your own personal holiness, but for Christ Himself.

"if Jesus is the truth that means one of us is VERY wrong

think about it"

And it's not about winning an argument; it's about an absolute standard that God has established and expected us to live by, knowing full well that we can't do it. We will transgress His law. We do need a Savior several times over. We are children of the first Adam, who sinned. We inherited that Adam's sin nature. And we continue to sin each day. Does the depth of "VERY wrong" break you? "Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity; and in sin my mother conceived me." It did for King David. One of us is very wrong because one of us continues to follow the ways of the world. But the Christian was once an unbeliever and just as wrong.

"I know that in our day rebel means sinner.

But everyone is sinning, so it is no longer rebellious to sin!

Jesus was a rebel who was counter-cultural."

"No glory in me

all glory to the King on the throne (Jesus)"

Don't rebel to bring glory to yourself. The world won't give you glory. You might give yourself selfish pride if you rebel for this reason. But God's glory far outshines ten billion kings'. He will not allow any part of His glory to be stolen by His creation.

"you either love Him or leave Him alone, but you can't do both"

Being a true disciple of Christ does not leave room for indecisively waffling at the door. You can't be indifferent toward Christ as you may be able to be about a job or a country. You cannot serve two masters, and if you both love Him and leave Him alone - or to put it differently, accept part of Him and reject part of His character and commands - you are doing that and creating God in your own image, when you are really created in His image to give Him glory. Eventually, you will love Christ and hate the ways of this world, or you will love the ways of this world and hate Christ.

"yeah, I know you heard that once in song

I pray you hear 10 more fo ya gone

hey listen up, homes"

Every time you hear truth and don't obey it, your heart will grow harder. But many people have to hear the truth many times before it will change them. God must work at the pace that He wills, to bring Him the most glory. But how many times have I heard the commands of Christ and refused to obey them, thinking they were too radical for me? How many times have I been told to share the gospel with others or even given a specific person to whom I must share the gospel, and I wouldn't do it? How wicked am I?

"Stage is the corner and my crowd is the streets

And I rap the bread of life cause they dyin' to eat"

"The streets" - they are not in the church yet. Most of them don't want to go near it. A Christian has non-Christians in his audience who watch him perform each facet of his life either for the glory of God or for the glory of himself. The world is watching. And they're dying to eat, but they will only eat the bread of life if God gives them a taste for it. They are more inclined to eat what will not satisfy because that is what they want, in their sinful nature. But the sower sowed the seed on all ground, not only the ground that looked fertile; God saw to it that those who would be saved by that message were saved.

"I'm a rebel, you know the kind that die in the street

Cause you refuse to conform, won't eat the kings meat"

Expect opposition from this world system today. Refusing to eat meat that has been sacrificed to an idol is not one of our issues today. But our cultures today have equivalents. And our rebellion against this world system can carry a high cost. Jesus was willing to die in His.

"Christ rebelled by shunning the culture

He eatin' with sinners, giving Pharisees ulcers

He never got married, he was broke, plus homeless

yeah that's the God I roll with"

Jesus Christ was willing to eat with unbelievers. That was significant because Pharisees only associated with their own and looked down on everyone else. When was the last time I sat down with an unbeliever and really talked with them, willingly? For me, evangelism is easier if I am in an unfamiliar place and I have met the person that I am witnessing to for the first time. But when co-workers who are not Christians talk to me, I tend to see it either as a bother from the task at hand or as a necessary break. In doing life, I tend to gravitate toward other believers to the extent that it may make me a Pharisee.

"ya boy gotta wife and no I never cheated"

Never cheating on your wife is by the grace of God. If you are a man with status, other women will want you. If you travel a lot (and rappers do), your wife could never find out if you broke your covenant with her. So this statement has to do with rebellion, but it is not just for status. Nearly every man goes through this form of temptation. It is only by God's grace that we stay faithful.

"I'm prayin for humility whenever I get heated"

Among other times, you can get mad or frustrated when you see the world living in a way contrary to Scripture or yourself not living to a high enough standard. In the former case, the temptation is to exalt yourself for beating the world's game. But that keeps you from standing for the truth with a tear in your eye and pointing the world to Christ.

"forget about the drugs; rebel against pornography"

Don't use sin, such as drugs, as a means of rebellion. Rebel against sin itself, such as looking at pornography, by refusing to engage in it and refusing to support or defend it. Christians should rescue those who are trapped in sins like that. But use wisdom, so that you will not fall. By the grace of God, I don't look at porn. But I have met many Christian men who do. And I don't want to fall, so I know there are some places I cannot go. Draw the line that you will not cross as far from the cliff as you can, and do it while in a wise frame of mind so that you will not have to try to do it in the heat of passion.

"this ain't how it oughta be, homie it' how it's gotta be

A rebel!"

The truth is not just a suggestion or one man's good idea. It is an absolute, worth striving hard for. Here, we have no lasting city. We seek a city that is to come. But that shouldn't stop us from seeking to bring others to that lasting city and using this life to long for that lasting city rather than our temporary monuments to human "greatness" that are passing away.

"You are just a conformist, if you are drunk and naked, driving around on a loud motorcycle, smoking cigarettes and breaking commandments, getting pregnant out of wedlock. Everyone has done that, it's so tired! If you really want to be a rebel, read your Bible, because no one is doing that! That's rebellion. That's the only rebellion left!"

-----

There is nothing better to do with your life today than to give Him glory. Have a passion for His glory and for your joy in that glory; "those two are one passion"!

"How sweet all at once it was for me to be rid of those fruitless joys which I had once feared to lose . . ! You drove them from me, you who are the true, the sovereign joy. You drove them from me and took their place, you who are sweeter than all pleasure, though not to flesh and blood, you who outshine all light, yet are hidden deeper than any secret in our hearts, you who surpass all honor, though not in the eyes of men who see all honor in themselves. . . . O Lord my God, my Light, my Wealth, and my Salvation."

- Augustine, Confessions.

"I have seen, when I was a boy, a juggler in the street throw up half-a-dozen balls, or knives and plates, and continue catching and throwing them, and to me it seemed marvellous; but the religious juggler beats all others hollow. He has to keep up Christianity and worldliness at the same time, and catch two sets of balls at once. To be a freeman of Christ and a slave of the world, at the same time, must need fine acting. One of these days you, Sir Juggler, will make a slip with one of the balls, and your game will be over."

- C.H. Spurgeon.

Second Thoughts on Park Days and a Philippines Update

For the past 4 years, I have been a season pass holder at my home theme park and have already renewed earlier this month for a fifth season there. But for the first time, I have felt convicted about that recently.

A lot of hobbies start off with very good intentions. I once took a homeless young man to the park with me, paying for the trip myself, and he had the time of his life. I also took a janitor from one of my previous employers to the park with me and allowed him to spend the whole day riding rides with me and other Christian in our office. On other occasions, I have been a single rider but have spent days befriending other single riders from other states and regions. I became friends on Facebook with one of them, and he has been able to see the many Christian quotes I put on my personal Facebook page. So I began to look at park visits as something with potential for evangelism and fellowship.

This year has been different. My usual park buddy from the past 3 seasons got married this spring. I went to the park with him in April before he got married. Other than that, all of my visits have been solo. This year, I have become more of a loner than I was in the past. So the visits this fall have been not only solo, but mostly silent. On my most recent visit, I barely interacted with anyone, just rode rides and interacted a minimal amount with the crews. The weather was awful for riding, but I went anyway because I knew the lines would be short. For the past two visits, the weather was sunny and I could spend the whole way there praying and the whole way back worshiping God in song. This time, I needed music on for the morning drive because it was cloudy. On the way back, I still worshiped but could not feel the reality of the songs in my life. It was mostly emotionless singing into empty space to admire the sound of my own voice. It was hollow, selfish worship using God-centered words.

The week had gone well up to that point. On Monday, my leave had been approved for going to the Philippines. (Since then, I have bought the tickets! :-) ) I had been reading more than I had in most other parts of the year. On the surface I looked pretty holy for the week. But after I got back, God started to reinforce that this park visit was selfish.

As a coaster enthusiast, I keep meticulous ride logs that include the total number of rides I take in each visit, my running totals for the year for each, and where I sat on the train for each ride. But yesterday, my main motive for going was just to make sure that I had more coaster rides this year than last year. I thought I had been slacking off.

But what else could I have been doing? As much as I dislike going to weddings, one of my other friends was getting married that day. There was no Saturday night service for that week, although I had arrived back from the park in time for that. So I could not minister to anyone in my church. It was a lost day, and it is better to lose my life than to waste it.

Going to the Philippines might help me to be less self-centered, and not just because cultures in the East tend to be more group-minded while American culture focuses much more on the individual. Pending a background check, I will get to see at least one of the children that I sponsor. I am trying to mentally prepare myself for his different world. But I don't know what to expect. I know some academic statistics about the international poverty line and how I can't buy a sandwich at Subway here with the money that most people there make in a week - if they can even find work for the day. I have seen pictures of the children that I have sponsored. But I have never been able to reach out my hand and touch a person who is truly poor by global standards. How could this affect me?

I hope and pray that these kids do not see me as an alternate Savior. My American lifestyle - wartime or not - could be a stumbling block that keeps them from seeing the gospel. They have needed to have faith for basic provisions in ways that I have not. But Scripture says, over and over, that as a Christian, I need to help people in need. So, although I seem to do a lot compared to many others in my church, I do very little when I compare myself to the Word. I should be doing more than just sending some money every month. My work weeks know very little of sacrifice, except for giving a good deal of time and effort to do work for others. Working in a job is not often a very voluntary form of service. A person who is common will do that same job and just take the money. A person who is consecrated will not stop there.

So in about 7 weeks, God willing, I will board a flight to the Philippines, not knowing what I may see there. I come with five loaves and two fish, trusting God to do with it as He will - and may that include feeding His sheep and drawing more into His kingdom?

You may be praying for God's plan to be carried out in some area. But some people only have the willingness to pray. Sometimes God's answer to those prayers is to set you on a course to do something through you for His glory. Recently, I have been more convicted that I should spend less time in solitude having high-flown thoughts about serving others and sharing the gospel, and more time actually serving others and sharing the gospel. One could say that the reason is the survival of my church, but that makes an idol out of my church. God will do as He wants with our church, but is His glory really our motivation for serving Him?

Although not entirely related, I feel compelled to mention this. What is the glory of God? Is it only seen in doing things for others, which seems to be the point of Jaeson Ma's song "Glory"? If the glory of God is only reflected in other people and is centered on man, as it were, then either 1) man is the origin of that glory and when God created man, man was given an attribute (glory) that God himself did not have, or 2) God didn't have glory until He created man, which means He gained a new attribute at creation which He has not had since eternity past, and thus He would not be an unchanging God. On another hand, if you don't realize that God does glorify Himself through changing the lives of people, your Christianity will not do any good for the world.

God is an eternally glorious being Who has displayed perfect love and perfect glory among His three Persons (Father, Son, and Holy Spirit) since before the world began. He created the universe as a means of glorifying Himself through the vast reaches of space and time. But His glory is eternal. Therefore, when we do things that give Him glory (not that we can give Him any that He does not already have; He needs nothing from us but graciously allows us to serve Him), that is an eternal investment and prevents our lives from being wasted on ourselves.

If you have prayed for me to go to the Philippines, thank you! This is something I have wanted to do for about ten years now for various reasons, but God had to refine those reasons and connect me with the right people in order to glorify Himself through it and not just give me an expensive vacation. I don't know why, but I was just thanking God for it without any tears since I found out I could go, although many tears in the past several years have gone into the prayers that I would go. Maybe it has not completely hit me yet. Maybe it won't until I am actually on the plane. :-)

Reflections on a Difficult NHL and KHL Offseason

2011 was possibly the most awkward and sad offseason in recent history for hockey. As the offseason neared its end and players took to the ice for their season openers during the past several days, I entered the new season with excitement but with a sobering thought I had never had in 16 years of following hockey: "At least no one else in hockey will die during the offseason this year."

"On May 13, 2011, [Derek] Boogaard was found dead in his Minneapolis apartment by family members. He was found unconscious and not breathing. Minneapolis Fire Department members were the first to arrive, and they pronounced him dead. He was a month and ten days short of his 29th birthday. ... An autopsy was performed, the results of which led a Minnesota medical examiner to conclude that Boogaard's death was accidental, albeit due to the lethal mixing of alcohol and oxycodone."

"A family member found [Rick] Rypien dead in his Crowsnest Pass, Alberta, home August 15, 2011. The cause of death was later confirmed as suicide. It is noted that he was battling depression for more than ten years."

"At approximately 1:33 p.m. on August 31, 2011, [Wade] Belak was found dead in a condo at the One King Street West hotel in Toronto. Police have not confirmed a cause of death, but Toronto Police treated it as a suicide. He was 35 years old, and had been preparing to take part in the upcoming season of Battle of the Blades. His death was the third in a string of NHL players found dead in a four-month span, following Derek Boogaard and Rick Rypien. His mother stated that he had been suffering from depression."

As a fan of fighting in hockey (and I don't want to start a debate over that here), I would go home from work and play hockey video games where I would fight against these three men and dozens of others like them. But video games miss the humanity of these men. Even the most diligent, most meticulous creators of video games can recreate humans at a mere photographic or cinematic level at best. Characters in video games do not go home to their families and friends and personally affect their lives. Characters in video games do not have to answer in a real-life court of law for their actions on or off the field. Their off-field struggles are, at best, a storyline to make the games more interesting.

In case the hockey world had not already experienced enough sadness for a decade during one offseason, one week after Belak's death, we heard about the horrific loss of, initially, 36 passengers and 7 of 8 crew members aboard a Yak-Service Yakovlev Yak-42 aircraft, which was carrying Lokomotiv Yaroslavl of the Kontinental Hockey League to Minsk, Belarus, to begin their 2011-12 season. Alexander Galimov remained conscious for several hours after the impact but was ultimately induced into a coma and died in hospital five days after the crash. The crash claimed the life of a Stanley Cup champion, Josef Vasicek. Vasicek, Karel Rachunek, Jan Marek, and Stefan Liv had also each won a gold medal at the World Championships. Liv had won an Olympic gold medal with Sweden in 2010. Karlis Skrastins held the NHL record for the most consecutive games by a defenseman. Pavol Demitra had gone to the KHL after a long and successful NHL career that saw him score 304 goals, appear in three All-Star games, and win the Lady Byng trophy as the league's most gentlemanly player. These losses, and the others, were huge losses for a great sport. Their impact will be felt during the years to come, not only for their families and others within one or two degrees of separation, but for entire teams and fanbases, everywhere that hockey is played or followed.

Every player and coach on the team died except for Maxim Zyuzyakin, a 20-year-old forward who head coach Brad McCrimmon asked to stay in Yaroslavl to rest and meet with them for their next game, and goaltending coach Jorma Valtonen, who was asked to stay in Yaroslavl to work with the junior team. The decisions to keep Zyuzyakin and Valtonen in Yaroslavl meant that their head coach saved their lives while the rest of their team boarded a plane to Minsk expecting to play their next game, but did not arrive in Minsk to play it. On the flip side, another 20-year-old player, defenseman Yuri Urychev, could not play the game in Minsk because he was injured and suspended, but he made the trip with his team anyway. Dedication to his team cost him his life.

A question many Americans tend to ask in response to a tragedy - most commonly, 10 years ago in response to the terrorist attacks in New York and DC - is "Where was God in this?" I do not know if Europeans would ask the same or a similar question. Americans ask it because, historically, we have had a nominally religious country, where faith in God is still a very influential factor in political candidacies and God takes the blame for a lot of tragic events, but we can take a look around us to demonstrate that this country is largely not Christian. A missionary friend on deputation to go to Europe told me that Europe has largely moved away from its formalistic religious traditions and become largely secular. Indeed, I have searched for and not seen any religiously-influenced responses to the tragedies of this past several months in hockey. Despite being neither a journalist nor a pastor, I might be the first.

Few players in professional hockey publicly promote any kind of religion. When Nazem Kadri practices his Muslim faith or his teammate James Reimer speaks out as a Christian, the hockey world sees that as unusual. I would venture to guess that hockey is probably the least religious, least spiritual of all major sports. In MLB, the NBA, and the NFL, expressing faith is more common. Thus it is fitting for the hockey world to have a largely aspiritual response to the deaths that occurred over this past offseason.

The tributes throughout the hockey world to their fallen teammates have been touching. Yaroslavl held a large mass funeral at their arena for their team's players and another one after Alexander Galimov died several days after the crash. Several NHL teams added memorials to their uniforms for their former players who had died in Yaroslavl. Several goaltenders have ordered new masks to pay tribute to their former teammates. The KHL delayed the start of its season by a week, and each of the seven games that took place on the new opening day began with a minute of silence.

True reflection on life takes more than a minute. The hockey world found these tragedies difficult but was able to resume cheering on the teams and players that remained. A hockey player does not skate around an artificial frozen pond, 200 feet long, solely for the purpose of making people cheer him on. He does not spend all 24 hours of each day skating in a vast cage bounded by ice, boards, Plexiglas, and the scoreboard and ceiling above him. After the game ends, the arena goes silent. The player must resume his life between the games. And so must you, as a fan. He, and you, have others in your lives to care for; a mind for thinking, planning, and reflecting; a heart for conveying a vast range of human emotions; and, most importantly and perhaps most overlooked of all, a soul.

Your purpose in life, regardless of your occupation or your beliefs, is to bring glory to God. That is the reason why you are here. There is a God who made and sovereignly controls this entire universe and everyone in it. As He made each facet of creation, He proclaimed that it was good and took joy in what He made. He watches and actively works as the galaxies, stars, planets, moons, oceans, plants, animals, cells, molecules, atoms, and subatomic particles work out His purpose. It all gives Him glory as He watches it on both the macro and micro scale. Humans are the only creatures with the capacity to hear what He has commanded them to do and refuse to do it. This is sin. It can be intentional or unintentional. You can commit sin without knowing what sin is.

Our cultures often give undue stress to certain kinds of hot-button sins, but God looks on the heart and the heart of every man, woman, and child is by nature sinful. If you wanted to stop evil, where would you stop it? It would be great to stop all killing, rape, human trafficking, assault, and theft in the world. Almost everyone considers those acts to be evil and does not like them. But what about lying - even white lies? What about slandering others, gossiping, insulting, or failing to respect others? What about thoughts of hatred, bitterness, envy, or wanting revenge against someone else? Do you think you have kept all ten commandments from the Torah: do not have any other gods before God, do not make carved images and worship them, do not take God's name in vain, honor your parents, do not kill, do not commit adultery, do not steal, do not lie, and do not covet? Jesus said that if you hate someone, that is tantamount to murder; and if you lust after someone in your mind, that is as sinful as adultery. These are all sins against a God Who has never sinned and Who cannot tolerate any kind of sin in His presence. These are all ways around giving Him glory that we devise as we live for ourselves or for others instead of for Him. He has to do something about it.

If people lived forever, we could take a gander at how much knowledge they could achieve and what they could contribute to society as they each studied one or multiple fields for hundreds or thousands of years on end. But people would also develop an infinite capacity to do evil. Even people that desire to do their society as much good as possible have evil in their hearts, and there is a punishment for any kind of evil: death. Death is actually, in a sense, an act of mercy because if someone dies young, they have sinned less than someone who lives a long life. And by nature, we are also all deserving of hell, where we will successfully give God glory by being tormented for all eternity as He punishes us forever for all of our sins.

Many people downplay the reality of hell or think it is too harsh - "cruel and unusual punishment" for someone who is basically good. But consider the authority of the God Who you sin against. If you tell a lie to someone else in your family, they may be mad at you, but you still usually get away with it, in terms of going on with life as usual. If you tell a lie under oath in a court of law and the judge is just, he will punish you, probably send you to prison for a felony and take away many of your rights. That is only a judge. If you betray a friend, you will probably lose that friend. If you betray your country, you will, in many cases, lose your life because of treason. God is a Judge with a standard of absolute perfection and the only sovereign King of Kings. Every nation on the earth is a drop in the bucket to Him because He has absolute authority and sovereignty in all of the universe. Sin against a God with limitless power and authority, Who is alone worthy of absolute respect and worship from everyone in the world, deserves infinite punishment.

Death can free you from the power of sin in this life, but in His mercy, God has provided a means to be free from the eternal penalty of sin! You and I deserve to die for our sins against Him. So if anyone died for us, it would have to be another man, to adequately atone for our sins. Yet, if that man was also sinful like you and me, he would have our problem too; he could only die for his own sins and not escape the eternal penalty of them. The Man who died for us had to be perfect like God in order to satisfy the wrath of God. So God, in His plan of redemption, sent His Son, Jesus Christ, into the world to live the perfect life that we could not live and die the perfect death that we could not die. And because Jesus was not sinful, He did not remain dead, but rose again on the third day. The resurrection proved that He was without sin!

You know that you can be saved if this news has an effect on you. If it causes you to hate your sin, you have at least the beginnings of repentance over your sin - a change of mind that says you will not live for sin and self anymore, but live for Christ instead and make war with the sin that remains in your life. Aside from this, you need only to believe wholeheartedly that Christ can save you through His finished work on the cross. There are no magic words, good deeds, religious rituals, participation in ministry, or even preaching the gospel faithfully to others that can save you. Salvation is only by the grace of God through faith in Jesus Christ alone. And He can save you - and you need Him to save you - regardless of how much evil you have done. Please repent of your sins, even of your righteousness if that righteousness is only in yourself.

Christians still have indwelling sin in their lives, and they still die every day. However, they do not face the same judgment from God as unbelievers do. God will see unbelievers as their Judge, looking at all of their misdeeds and sentencing them to eternal punishment in hell. He will look at Christians as their Father, reward them for what they have done in their lives for Him, and usher them in to an eternity of joy with Him in heaven. There are many fake Christians in the world. The true Christians are those who see that they have been forgiven and, in response to that, do what He commands and live a changed life that proves their changed heart.

I am not going to say that the members of Lokomotiv Yaroslavl and the NHL players who died this offseason are definitely in heaven or definitely in hell. A lot of bad theology tends to come out at funerals, as people comfort one another with "He is in a better place now" and similar statements. Where they are now is known by them and God. I did not know any of them on a personal level or read much about their personal lives, so I do not know where they are. I will say this: if any of them genuinely knew Christ, those around them would have seen a difference in them from the other people around them. I hope that they did know Christ and are rejoicing with their Lord today. On the other hand, they had one life to use in bringing God glory. If they did not bring God glory here on earth, hell is eternal. You are still alive and still have your chance to turn from our sins and trust in Christ. How long you will remain alive and have that chance is not guaranteed. There were probably some people on that plane who thought they had more time.

Please do not think that this post was anti-hockey or anti-sports. In case you have not seen my writing before, I believe that work was created by God and any kind of work that is not wrong in itself (e.g. working as a career criminal) gives Him praise if done for that reason. This includes sports, as I wrote on "The Proper Place of Sports and Delighting in God". I wrote this, not to be hateful, but out of love for not only other hockey fans and anyone else who might read this, but more than that, for my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, who is worthy of all of my praise, worship, and obedience. The gospel, if presented accurately according to the Bible, is by its nature offensive. Yet through an offensive cross and a violent death, Jesus took on all of my sins and saved me and can do the same for you.

In conclusion, the new hockey season is underway on both sides of the Atlantic. Let's remember the players and coaches who can't be part of it and thankfully root on those who we still get to see.